And so it begins

Its been a while since the last update. Both my wife and I have been ill. My wife particularly. Feelings of nausea and tiredness have meant that family and work have been our main concerns. The New Year has started slowly for me. I usually travel for work down to Cardiff in Wales or the south west of England. But so far this year I’ve only had one trip to Cardiff. We have decided to reorganise our garden and started by digging out a quince bush. I thought this would take less than an hour to achieve but in the end it took one and a half days. We have sandy soil and there were roots everywhere. I can barely lift my arms to type as I now am so stiff and aching. I don’t like this time of year when I am not feeling 100% I miss the long hours of daylight and the chance to be outdoors. There is nothing as nice as sitting in the garden with beer or with the family around for a barbeque. I also enjoy working in the garden – its something to do with being English. Mind you the year ahead will mean a lot of working in the garden. I find that gardening is a little like doing Tai Chi or yoga. Your body is active but your mind is focussed and while gardening I am not thinking about anything else. All of life’s problems recede into the background and when I am finished working I can appreciate that I have had a respite from them.

My eldest son and my daughter in law are going to Relate (a counselling service in England) and they both seem to getting something positive out of it. Neither of them say much about the sessions now as they have agreed to keep conversation about their problems “in the box”. They only open the box at the relate session. This is fine, its their problem after all. It’s a little frustrating not knowing what they’re talking about after being so close to them during the initial break up talking issues through but they have to sort this out one way or another. I just feel relegated to the side lines now, not as involved. The last I heard they were discussing my son’s depression and trying to get at the cause(s). This sounds to me like psychoanalysis rather than marriage guidance but I’ve never needed to have marriage guidance myself so I don’t know if this is a valid method of sorting him out or not. He seems a lot happier but I don’t know whether that’s only a result of his medical treatment or not. I would like to think that he is feeling better as he is changing into a happier person rather than a result of his medication. He says that the relate sessions are helping so it’s looking positive. We’re still here for them. We baby sat while they went to London last week for a couple of days and I’m glad we did. Part of the thank you was a rather nice bottle of Montrachet. This was the good stuff Pinot Noir etc. Marvellous.

My second son D had his 30th birthday last week. We gave him a large bottle of whisky and a pile of jazz and Zappa cds. He was telling us that his girlfriend was thinking of moving in. It would be nice for him to have some able bodied company. He says that he is happy living alone and will be just as happy if she moves in. I’m glad that he’s happy. His parachute jump has been moved to the 18th of February so I won’t see him until then. It’s good to know that in spite of his MS he is enjoying his life. He has been sustained by music and his good friends. He is even thinking of learning to drive. I admire his positive outlook and I am very proud of him.