A good Saturday night

We had a great family evening on Saturday night. My son D who has MS came over for the weekend and we planned a quiet time. My daughter had other plans. She arranged an impromptu meal and arrived at our house with food and drink and a game called cranium. We ate well, my grandchildren got to see their uncle and we sat down for a few riotous hours playing this wonderful game. We all had rather too much to drink but that just made the game funnier. It was the type of family evening we could have been having for many years. The potential was always there its just that I don’t think we were close enough to relax sufficiently to enjoy each others company as adults in such depth. Throughout my son and daughters splitting up/getting back together problems I have felt that I have become much closer to both of them but particularly close to my daughter in law. I feel much more in tune with her now because we have spent a lot of time talking things through. I now know more about her feelings and aspirations and I am glad that she is still married to my son. I know her likes and dislikes, what we have in common and more importantly I now have an idea of the type of birthday and Christmas presents she would actually enjoy. There are still issues to be addressed within their relationship but the love seems to have returned to their house and I am happy for them, they deserve to be happy and they deserve to be happy with each other.

I awoke on Sunday morning to the sound of my two year old granddaughter gently knocking on my bedroom door and asking me if I was awake. If you don’t have grandchildren you have no idea of the joy they bring to your life. To say that I love them both would be an enormous understatement. I don’t deserve grandchildren like these. I don’t think that I was a particularly good father and I think up until November 05 I wasn’t a particularly good father in law either. My son and daughter’s problems made me realise that I was too wrapped up in my own condition to be happy. I now know what is required of me and I also know that I love everyone in my family. I dreamt about them on Saturday night and again on Sunday night, something I have never done. I don’t now how much help I was to my son and daughter during their major bust up but I do know that going through that pain with them has changed me for the better. There is so much love in the family now I can feel it around me. It was probably there all along and I just didn’t notice. Here’s a big tip to any unhappy people out there: fall in love. Love can save you and redeem you, it can heal you but the most significant thing about being love is how it makes you see and interact with the world. I’m a Gentleman again, a Father again, a Dad again and I feel f@cking marvellous.