Its been a while since my last update. There’s no particular reason – the geek in me has had to take a back seat as I have had to do other things, make plans for the garden for example – the work on that stopped when the snow kicked in. I’ve also had to investigate holidays and I really hate doing that nowadays. Over the last three years I’ve arranged and booked a holiday without any input from my wife. She doesn’t seem to have any imagination or adventure left within her spirit. Also over the last four years I have booked holidays that I have had to cancel because others have dropped out at the last minute or my wife has just said “no I don’t want to go” or “we can’t afford to go there”. I am pig sick of having to make this annual decision. I want to see the world don’t get me wrong. However I don’t want to lie on a beach for two weeks. Last year we ended up in Lesvos, an idyllic Greek island in the Aegean Sea, a really beautiful place with nothing to do but sit in the sun during the day, have a lovely meal and a drink in the evening and watch other tourists doing exactly the same things. As a restful time it worked perfectly. For all of the first week we lay by the pool getting tanned (my wife thought that we couldn’t afford to hire a car). I was stir crazy after that week and insisted we get out and about. We did in the end hire a car and got to see the entire island in the second week. My wife always wants to go to Spain or the Canaries (or Greece more lately) and lie in the sun. I understand that she spends her year in the company of small children which is enough to drive anyone somewhere warm for a little time doing nothing at all. Sadly I’m fed up with that. I spend most of the year talking to idiots. Coming up with last minute solutions to impossible problems caused by other f@cking people. I need a little more than a good lie down.
For the last 5 years I’ve wanted to go to America, to see the Grand Canyon specifically and to spend some time in the desert. I have also wanted to visit New York, San Francisco and New Orleans for many years now. I feel that time is running out. There are other places that I also want to visit, Australia, New Zealand, China, Japan, India, Peru, Hawaii and Bora Bora. If I don’t go soon I will never go. In Europe there also some countries I want to visit. Italy (I’ve never been!), France, Portugal, Ireland, Croatia, Sardinia, Corsica, Malta the list goes on and on. Nowadays I get the feeling that my wife is a little agoraphobic and a little anxious about visiting places that we have never visited before. Its loss of control I think. In the past she was a mother who controlled and managed the children. She was brave on their behalf. Now that the children are all adults she has to be brave for herself and she struggles with that. Its trust too. I don’t think that she trusts me anymore. She doesn’t trust my driving (at home or abroad) or my ability to keep her safe. Short of going off on my own I don’t know how this situation is going to be resolved. It is, as they say in this part of Lancashire, doing my head in.
My eldest son’s marriage problems have settled down a bit. At the moment they are back together and appear to be deeply in love. My daughter is still not wearing her wedding ring. She’s waiting for a romantic gesture of some kind that will signal my son’s love for her in a direct and meaningful way (after her fling she organised a trip to Gretna to renew marriage vows). I was surprised to hear that my son had never bought her any jewellery at all during their 17 year relationship. IF YOU’RE READING THIS SON SHE LIKES RUBIES! Mother’s day is surely an opportunity not to be missed. I really hope that they can rebuild their relationship into something that is as good or preferably better than it was originally. They had everything but lost track of themselves. They are lucky; they’ve had a second chance. My hopes and wishes will be with them forever.